Saturday 25 June 2016

The Lunatics Have Taken Over The Asylum


I start this post off with an apology. I’m going to rant again. I’m going to talk about politics again.

And my language may not be what you would expect from a polite mild-mannered Englishman.

I’m sorry.

On Thursday my country voted to leave the European Union. I voted to stay.

I lost.

I am a sore loser and I am still barely able to contain my frustration and anger about this.

The United Kingdom consists of Northern Ireland, Scotland, Wales and England but as a country we are not united at all. My own country, England, together with Wales voted to leave. Scotland and Northern Ireland wanted to stay. Yet now they will be dragged out of the European Union, alongside those English and Welsh people, like me, who want to stay.

And it stinks.

I can’t believe that just over half of my fellow countrymen, the ones who could actually be bothered to turn up, chose to turn their back on Europe based on a weird form of patriotism and a disturbing undercurrent of xenophobia.

I am gutted and angry. And yes – I am bitter too.

The immediate effects are obvious – the value of our currency has plummeted and the stock markets have dropped like a stone, something that the economists warned would happen. The problem is that the leavers, who have been seduced by a false sense of optimism, are saying “We’re British! We’ll be fine! We have our country back!”

I’m not a man of violence but the primitive, primeval animal within me wants to lash out at these idiots.

Now I’m sure that some leavers genuinely had reasons to vote the way they did but the truth of the matter is that the rest didn’t.

I actually saw one man interviewed who said:

“I’m a bit shocked to be honest. I’m shocked that we actually have voted to Leave, I didn’t think that was going to happen.

My vote, I didn’t think was going to matter too much because I thought we were just going to Remain, and the David Cameron resignation has blown me away to be honest.

I think the period of uncertainty that we’re going to have for the next couple of months, that’s just been magnified now.

So yeah, quite worried.”

Are you insane? What a fucking moron.

There is also a story I heard involving a young black woman talking to a white woman about the result. As they were chatting, a man walked past, pointed at the black woman and said “Great result – now we’ll send you home!”

Send her home to where, you racist fuckwit? She’s ENGLISH!

My own son is furious because he feels totally let down by the older generation. Why? Because the older generation mainly voted to leave.

Here is how the voting went over the age groups according to YouGov:

18-24: 75% Remain

25-49: 56% Remain

50-64: 44% Remain

65+: 39% Remain

Read those figures again – the majority of people under 50 wanted to stay whereas the majority of people over 50 wanted to leave. 
There is a lot of bitter resentment in young people and I am ashamed at those people my age and older who have potentially made our country a worse place to be for the younger generation in future.

I fully understand why they are angry.
Furthermore, this result has shattered any plans I had of spending my later years in sunny southern Europe. 
On a lighter note, I turned up for work yesterday having watched David Cameron’s resignation speech, and faced my work colleagues who wanted to see my reaction. Regular readers know that my work colleagues regard me as a grumpy old man prone to comedy rants.
And they weren’t disappointed. I ranted several times during the day but, even as I poured comedic scorn over the clown prince of idiocy, Boris Johnson, and the fish faced freak, Nigel Farage, I could see in their faces that they too were disappointed. If there were any leavers in my audience, they didn’t make their views known.
And now the leave politicians are asking for calm and unity. 
How the fuck can I be calm when and suddenly be magnanimous in defeat when I am so bitter and angry that we have been shafted just so that David Cameron can heal rifts in the Conservative Party?
The blame for this debacle lies fully at the feet of David Cameron. The man has taken a political gamble using my country and has lost, just so that he can appease his party. 

"WHAT HAVE I DONE????????"
I also blame Boris Johnson who, despite his vehement denials, used this referendum to stake his claim on Number 10 Downing Street. 

"I'M GOING TO BE PRIME MINISTER! SHAME THE COUNTRY WILL BE A DISASTER AREA!"
I blame the odious Michael Gove who is also a pretender to David Cameron’s now vacant throne.

"DON'T CALL ME ODIOUS! I'M MUCH WORSE THAN THAT!!!"
And if I am ever unfortunate enough to meet Nigel Farage, my wrath will explode so much that I will mutate into The Plastic Hulk and forcefully take him out of the country and maroon him on an island surrounded by hungry cannibals with a penchant for fish.

Nothing more to be said!
There are lots more people to blame for this but I have to stop now otherwise I will be writing forever!
Anyway, normal service will hopefully be resumed when I eventually calm down but I can’t guarantee that it will be soon.
For now, I think the songs below perfectly sum up how I feel.






To be honest at the moment  I feel like emigrating to the Dark Side of the Moon.

8 comments:

Elephant's Child said...

I really, really hope a second referendum is held, given the relatively low turn-out, and given the close(ish) result.

River said...

The story in my newspaper this morning made a very good point. All of the older generations who voted to leave, won't be around long enough to see or feel the full consequences of their votes. The younger generations will be the ones that have to cope and suffer.
It's going to be a hard few years for you all until things settle and the country can maybe begin to rebuild.

Plastic Mancunian said...

Hi EC,

I would love a second referendum but I doubt it will happen. Besides, the EU are now pretty angry with us and want to get us out before any of the other 27 countries decide to do the same.

Cheers

PM

Plastic Mancunian said...

Hi River,

I am an optimist so I hope you're right.

:o)

Cheers

PM

Pandora Behr said...

We have a thing here, a referendum needs to make 60-75 % for the law to pass. I've been watching the Brexit thingy with interest. I'm hoping something will give soon. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Everybody I know voted to say in ( bar one and she's effing loopy).

Thoughts are with you,

Pand

Plastic Mancunian said...

Hi Pand,

Well it made 72% and people are not happy because of that.

It won't change anything despite the majority of MPs being for Remain.

Crazy times determined by crazy people!

:o(

Cheers

PM

jeremy said...

Brilliant rant my friend.

Will it all end by dissolving the Union and returning to the ancient kingdoms of Wessex Mercia Northumbria etc. Ireland can re-unite, Wales and Scotland can go back to whatever they were. Little Englanders are too small minded to be given the power to determine what happens to the reasonable majority.

I too am amazed that it came down to a simple majority vote rather than as has been said a 60-75% swing to make such a momentous upheaval.

The hypocrisy over the immigration issue has been staggering. I knew an old lady who emigrated to Spain because she was sick of foreigners coming here!! Duh. The leave campaign was based on scaring the less informed that we were to be swamped by sponging foreigners In reality, the real spongers are lousy parasites like the chinless wonders Nigel & Boris, who have probably never done a day's honest work in their lives and have probably exploited foreigners throughout that time. I thought we'd seen the last of that arsehole Farage when he lost his seat in Parliament.

I wonder how long it will be before the Leave lot will wake up and smell the (foreign) coffee?

Plastic Mancunian said...

Hi Jeremy,

The old lady story is funny but not surprising. Sadly, I don't think we've seen the last of Farage at all. He's currently trying to get involved again I hear.

Sadly, I think we're now on a one way trip and I can't see anything else but months of turmoil, probably years.

No doubt that any economic fallout will be blamed on whichever government is in power - but the real reason will be obvious to anyone with half a brain.

I despair, Jeremy, I really do.

:o|

Cheers

PM