Miscellaneous Questions

 

Welcome to a snowy South Manchester on day 317 of Covid-19 restrictions. I woke up this morning to see a fairly heavy snowstorm dumping its wares on the streets of the city. We don’t usually get a lot of snow here so it is a bit of a surprise to be honest. We went for a small walk and I am pleased to say that the snow has now stopped and is starting to melt. You may think I am being miserable but I hate snow and when it arrives, I can’t wait to see the back of it. If the temperature rises or it starts to rain, then the snow will disappear. Let’s hope so.

I am going to return to writing silly posts sometime next week, a return to the bilge that I have been writing since 2008, when I first decided to start pouring my nonsense into cyberspace. There are 809 posts out there in the name of the Plastic Mancunian, not including this one, so there is plenty out there to enjoy (or not as the case may be).

In the meantime, I shall continue to answer silly questions for Sunday Stealing.

Shell we dive in?

1.Which is more romantic: an expensive, glittering bouquet OR flowers that were handpicked as they grew beside the parkway?

I have to confess that I have no idea. I am a man and I have never understood the appeal of receiving flowers, whether a huge glittering, arranged bunch of expensive flowers or a sad bunch of wild flowers lovingly picked from a roadside. What I do know is that a bunch of flowers is pleasing to the female of the species and as such I know that I can accrue a houseful of Brownie Points by presenting such to the women in my life. I would hazard a guess that an expensively arranged bunch are more appealing and so that is what I would buy.  

2.Do you know yourself well enough to understand why you feel the way you do?

Absolutely. I question my feelings all the time. For example, at the moment I starting to come out of the January blues because the days are getting longer and we are edging towards the end of the worst month of the year. I feel this way every year at this time and it is a combination of being far away in time from the summer, the cold days and even colder nights and the sheer boredom of not being able to do anything exciting. To be honest, the current lockdown doesn’t make a difference because I would be doing nothing anyway in this month. Conversely, when I am happy, I know exactly why and being happy is my usual frame of mind even in the current circumstances.

3.Which do you do more often: let movies, songs and books put your feelings into words for you or put your feelings into words by yourself?

I regard certain songs as being full of poetry; some words written by certain songwriters can express my feelings far better than I can. The same goes for books and films; the people who write them are generally very good wordsmiths, far better than I am at articulating feelings. 

That said, I do have my moments and, sometimes, I can make people laugh or think with a phrase or sentence that my weird mind has somehow constructed and exposed to the world. 

4.Do you believe celebrities when they are endorsing a product?

Absolutely not. For example, I love Mr T and (I may have said this before) I would love to have a SatNav with his voice. Can you imagine that?

“Turn left, fool!” 

“Quit your jibber-jabber and make sure you turn right in 100 yards.”

As much as I love him, I can’t believe for one second that he eats Snickers on a regular basis – if at all.

5.What kind of movies do you wish were made more often?

I can’t get enough science-fiction and superhero films. You may think that is sad but I am a geek and I don’t care. There have been a plethora of them over the last few years but I want more. More Star Trek, more aliens and more Marvel/DC. Bring it on.

6.Does fashion matter to you?

Absolutely not. 

In fact I think fashion is a ridiculous thing that can some people into arses. Some people want to be seen wearing the latest clothes, no matter how expensive they are or ridiculous they look, just to get one up on their friends. 

“Ooohhh! Look at my Gucci shoes. They cost £500 – I am soooooo pleased with them.”

Me? I just buy and wear what I like, although Mrs PM does have a say. But even then I won’t buy an overpriced T-shirt just to please her. 

7.Should politicians be held to the same legal standards as everyone else?

Absolutely. For example, in my opinion, Donald Trump should be investigated and tried for some of the things he has done in his tenure of the White House, particularly his alleged tax-dodging and his alleged incitement of a mob of nutters to move on the Capitol Building.

8. If you became president, whom would you invite to sing at your inauguration?

I would invite lesser known artists that I love, like Riverside, Devin Townsend and Steven Wilson. 

Oh – and the Foo Fighters because Dave Grohl is the nicest guy in rock. And Nine Inch Nails too.

9. Do you try to write/say what you are feeling in a true and simple way?

Yes – how else can you let people know?

10.What is your worst daily habit?

As I said in last week’s questions, I love the night and the day and if I could, I would give up sleeping so that I can enjoy as much as I can. Consequently I have to force myself to go to bed sometimes so that I can get enough sleep to be refreshed the next day. It is a habit that I can achieve on school nights (Sunday to Thursday) but I usually stay up too late at the weekend and am annoyed with myself for getting up later on Saturday and Sunday.

11.If you had your choice which one TV show would you have cancelled?

Mrs Brown’s Boys. 

You may not have heard of it if you are outside the UK but this so-called comedy show is prime time on Saturday night and Christmas day. It has also spawned a chat show of sorts called All Round to Mrs Brown’s.

It was recommended to me by my step-sister-in-law who is a very intelligent woman, a detective constable in the police no less. “It’s the funniest show on TV!” she proclaimed. I watched it for about ten minutes before I switched it off in disgust. It was not funny at all. 

Mrs Brown is played by an Irish comedian called Brendan O’Carroll who dons a wig to become the titular woman. 

I just don’t understand why it is so popular.

12.Do you like the taste of sweet or salt?

Anarchy prevails – both!

13.Are you very precise about what words you use to describe your feelings and thoughts?

I think so. Why wouldn’t you be?

14.What do you feel the most guilty about?

I try not to dwell on such things. The past is the past and people need to move on.

15.Do you meditate? 

I have to confess that I have tried mindfulness, which is a form of meditation. It does help but the problem is that I don’t do it often enough. I find that it helps on those rare occasions when I can’t get to sleep.