The Blog Tour Blog

I’ve been challenged again, this time by Pandora at Princess Pandora - Queen of Denial, to attempt the Blog Tour Blog, answering the following questions:

(1) What am I working on?
(2) How does my work differ from others in its genre?
(3) Why do I write what I do?
(4) How does my writing process work?

I’m also supposed to nominate others – but I won’t do that.

Instead, if you read this and fancy having a go, please feel free and let me know in a comment.

Anyway, here goes:

What am I working on?

As well as writing the odd post for this blog, I am currently working on my third travelogue and an autobiography. The travelogue covers a trip to Japan from last year and takes the form of a daily diary. Japan is a wonderful place to visit and I just wanted to record everything we did, which meant taking copious notes, countless photos and even the odd voice recording while wandering the streets of Osaka. Sadly, progress is slow because, due to work commitments, time is sometimes too short to spend the amount of time I need to spend. Nevertheless, there is progress and one day I will finish it.

As for my autobiography, I realised that I am not getting any younger and it would be nice for my kids to be able to read about my life growing up in Walsall, studying in Liverpool, living in Manchester and travelling around the world. This is most definitely a background project and I add a few notes every now and then. I don’t think it will find its way onto the internet, but I hope that one day, it might be passed down to kids, grandkids etc. I would have loved to have read an autobiography of my own ancestors and I would hope that further down the line, my thoughts and words may be interesting to my future family.

There is one other thing. I have a novel in my head which has a beginning and an end, something that previous novel ideas have severely lacked. I have even written a brief synopsis and a few hundred words. Maybe one day I might actually dive into it with a bit more devotion and actually produce something I am proud of.

How does my work differ from others in its genre?

When I first put pen to paper with my China travelogue, I had in mind something similar to the travel writing of Bill Bryson. It soon became clear to me that I wanted it to be more personal, more like a journal than a treat for tourists. My Australia travelogue was actually a birthday present for Mrs PM’s mum who accompanied us on the trip, which meant that this too was very personal; I wanted her to have a detailed reminder of every experience on that once in a lifetime trip. I guess the same is true for my current Japanese travelogue.

Most autobiographies are interesting because the people involves are famous or have achieved something extraordinary. I am just a normal person living a normal life so my autobiography, if I ever finish it, will be not the most riveting read. I guess that, too, is very personal.

As for my novel idea, regular readers will know that I am a huge fan of science fiction and in reality it will not differ that much from the weirder works of Dean Koontz.

Why do I write what I do?

My writing, including my blog posts, has to be of interest to me. I would struggle to avoid expressing my own thoughts and opinions in the nonsense I write, which means that I tend to stick to subjects and genres that interest me. I need to express myself and writing is my favourite way of doing so. In my last blog post, I hinted that I might give up the blog and pour my thoughts into another medium; the truth is, I don’t think I will be able to. There is little point in writing about a subject if nobody reads it. Sadly, this means that I will continue to pour my drivel into cyberspace – I’m sorry, dear reader.

How does my writing process work?

The process is different depending on what I am writing.

For a blog post, a thought usually pops into my head and I immediately try to make a note of it, either by writing it down in a notebook or sending myself an email, if I don’t have a notebook with me. Blog posts are rough and ready and, while I do spend time researching if necessary, I usually post them after one or two minor rewrites.

For everything else, I am more of a perfectionist. In a typical session, I do a little research, write freely for a while and then walk away. When I return, I read my words two or three times , refine them, do a little more research and walk away again, repeating the process until I am reasonably happy with my work.

This is an interesting idea, and I am sure that professional writers would be very quick to offer advice on the best practices for writing, how to find ideas, how to go about research as well as how to refine your work into something that people will want to read.

Me? I’m just an amateur who enjoys writing as a hobby.

I just hope that you, dear reader, have a little bit of fun reading my weird words.

Blog Survey

Today, I was going to steal another meme from Sunday Stealing but it was the third part of a massive 100 question effort. Laziness prevailed and I decided against it.

Instead, I found a blog survey, courtesy of Comedy Plus and decided to steal that instead.

Here we go:

1. If you have pets, do you see them as merely animals, or are they members of your family?

We have two black cats, a male called Jasper and a female called Poppy. They are brother and sister and are almost nine years old. Jasper is an enormous greedy monster who can barely crowbar himself through the cat flap; Poppy lives in a constant state of terror and is frightened of everything – including herself.

Mrs PM thinks of them as “her babies” so I guess that makes them part of the family. I know for a fact that I am the fourth most important creature in our house, behind Mrs PM and the cats. In fact, the cats rule, jointly and we are merely slaves, pampering them, feeding them and serving their every desire.

Who said that the world is dominated by mankind? If our house is anything to go by we live in a feline dominated world, with humans being merely subservient serfs.

I know my place.

2. If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?

My dream is to escape the rat race and become a totally free agent. I hate being tied to “the man” and forced to answer his every whim simply to survive. There is nothing better than leaving work on a Friday knowing that I have two days free of this dreadful form of modern servitude. Of course, if you read my answer to question one, you will realise that the cats are my real masters; but I can cope with that. After all, I am bigger than they are and there are only two of them (unless you count Jasper as three cats – which you could quite easily do if you were very short sighted and saw him from a distance).

3. What is the one thing most hated by you?

Liars and selfish deceivers who twist the facts for their own gain. You see it every day when a politician blatantly tells lies on the TV in front of millions of people. And it’s not just politicians. You see it in the world of business, celebrity and other walks of life.

Crikey, I sound bitter, don’t I? I’m not really – I just like everything to be honest. And the world is not an honest place – and that bugs me.

4. What would you do with a billion dollars?

I would go to America because you can’t spend dollars in England.

Actually, I would take a year out and travel first class to as many weird and wonderful countries as I could and I would write about my experiences. I would, of course, make sure that loved ones were looked after and I would probably become some kind of weird philanthropist simply because a billion dollars is much more than I could ever conceivably spend.

I would also build a monstrous castle by the sea, somewhere near to Manchester, and live there in luxury.

I might also buy a few properties abroad.

Stupidly (and hypocritically) I would also buy Walsall Football Club and make sure that they won the Premiership.

5. What helps to pull you out of a bad mood?

That depends. Most of the time, it is the mere sight and sound of my beloved Mrs PM. However, if Mrs PM is the source of my bad mood, then I find beer and loud rock music blast away the negativity. Or something that makes me laugh, like a good bit of comedy.

6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?

That’s a difficult one. There is no better feeling than loving someone but you need to be loved to fully appreciate the experience. I would therefore say both.

7. What is your bedtime routine?

Turn off the TV. Make sure that the front and back doors are both locked. Tell Jasper to look after the house while I am asleep (difficult because he is asleep too – usually on the bed). Turn on the burglar alarm by stroking it fondly. Go to the toilet. Clean my teeth. Get undressed. Get into bed. Get out of bed and go back into the bathroom because I forgot to flush the toilet. Go back into the bedroom. Take off my glasses. Set the alarm. Wind up Mrs PM using a variety of irritating techniques. Get into bed. Read my book. Switch off the light. Go to sleep. Have weird dreams.

8. If you are currently in a relationship, how did you meet your partner?

I met Mrs PM at work and we worked together for a few months before we went to Hong Kong on a business trip together. That was around twelve years ago. We don’t work together any more.

9. If you could watch a creative person in the act of the creative process, who would it be? 

I would watch Geddy Lee, Neil Peart and Alex Lifeson at work composing the next Rush song.

10. What kinds of books do you read?

I love a good novel, particularly a decent horror story, a magnificent space opera, a good comedy, a Robert Ludlum-style thriller or anything that is weird.

11. How would you see yourself in ten years time?

I would love to have finished work and be enjoying the freedom I crave. In reality, I will be older and fatter and those grey flecks will have invaded more of my hair.

And I will probably still be working.

12. What’s your fear?

I am scared of heights and spiders. I am also terrified of Chinese toilets and public speaking – particularly when the two are combined.

13. Would you give up all junk food for the rest of your life for the opportunity to visit outer space?

I would love to see Earth from space but the prerequisites for space travel scare me to death. So, no – I would not give up junk food for a trip to space.

14. Would you rather be single and rich or married, but poor?

Ideally, I would like to be married and rich – but failing that, married and poor.

15. What’s the first thing you do when you wake up?

Open my eyes. Look at the alarm clock. Howl in anguish. Get up and head for the bathroom. Weigh myself. Howl in anguish. Get undressed. Go to the toilet. Weigh myself again in the hope that a full bladder and my T-shirt account for the extra pounds. Howl in anguish. Have a shower. Weigh myself for a third time to see if any dirt that might have accumulated and has now been washed off by the shower might account for the extra pounds. Howl in anguish. Leave the bathroom depressed and head back to the bedroom totally possessed by the grumpy monster within.

16. If you could change one thing about your spouse/partner what would it be?

I’ve said this before and I shall say it again. I would annihilate her musical taste and replace it with my own. I love music but the stuff she listens to (and forces me to listen to) is utterly dreadful.

Apart from that, she’s perfect.

17. If you could pick a new name for yourself, what would it be?

Clint Ironheart.

18. Would you forgive and forget no matter how horrible a thing that special someone has done?

It depends what the person did. However, I doubt they would be special any more.

19. If you could only eat one thing for the next 6 months, what would it be?

Cheese on toast.